Vet Wisdom® Café

Wordless Wednesday - Mojo

This is Mojo. Our loyal reader, Midge, sent me this picture to share, along with Mojo's story.

In Midge's words:

"Mojo was the devoted companion to my good friends, Rick and Michelle.  He lived a wonderful life, but unfortunately most recently developed bone cancer.  Michelle and Rick are firm believers of "Life with No Regrets" for their pets. Mojo recently went to Rainbow Bridge, but he left us with a touch of his humor.....the yellow spot in the snow!  He was a great and elegant Dog and a wonderful companion and friend!

He loved a good bone, as any gentleman likes a good cigar. I mean, this dog would look at you and I swear his eyes were human. He had this quality of looking into your soul, very easy and special bonding with a dog like Mojo. He is sorely missed by all of us, but by Michelle and Rick most. I know there are no obituaries for animals, but Mojo was exceptional and deserves to be in print."

Thank you for sharing Mojo with us, Midge. We send out loving thoughts to Rick, Michelle, and all who loved him.

--Tammy

Burying a Pet

I have been thinking about this subject lately. At this point, my kitties are all OK and still with us. (Henry is still scrawny, but eating, and more like himself!)

But, since we have moved again, I've thought about what I would do if or when one of our cats dies. I'm not typically overly sentimental about a pet's body after it has died. I have never chosen to have a pet cremated and ashes returned to me. While living in Colorado at my little place in the country, I did bury my Bear cat. There is a stone marker in the pasture where he rests. And when we euthanized our Miss Girl, she found a resting place there too.

Since that time, the house has been sold, and I don't know the owners of it anymore. I don't know if the markers for my cats remain in place or not. I think it is OK if they aren't there anymore. I know where they are buried, and I can still drive by and "say hi" when I visit Colorado. It is a little sad that I don't know who lives there now - and they'll likely never know that my kitties were buried there.

Now, as for the cats we have now - I just don't know what we'd do. We live in an apartment, so burying them near home obviously isn't an option (and can be illegal depending on where you live!) I know that there are pet cemetaries and memory gardens in many places. (There was one near where we lived in Oregon. I don't know if there is one here in California, but I would be surprised if there isn't.) I have mixed feelings - for myself - about doing that with my pets though.

I think I might choose to have them cremated, but then I'm not sure what I would do with the ashes. I love some of the urns that we carry at World by the Tail, but I don't know if I want that for myself. I know I don't have to know any of these answers now, but as our cats are all getting elderly (Oscar is 14 and Ben and Henry are both 10.) we may have to face decisions about this type of thing in the not-too-distant future.

Have you thought about what you would choose to do for a pet that is still living currently? Would you choose a pet cemetary? Or would you cremate them? Ashes back, or not? I'm interested to hear what your opinions and choices might be. We talk a lot about being prepared. I guess that's why I've thought about this. I don't want to be caught off guard in a new town, with no resources, if or when the time comes for me to bury a pet. (I know one thing for sure - I want a ClayPaws® print of each cat!)

--Tammy

A Memorial Ceremony

Have you ever done or considered holding a memorial ceremony for a pet? It's becoming more common for pet parents to want to do something of this sort to honor a beloved pet who has died.

We have a new product that we think will be a great way to help you with a memorial for a pet. Our new Tribute Ballons can be part of a balloon releasing ceremony - a powerful way to honor a pet's memory. After inflating these balloons with helium, there is a space to write the pet's name or a message.

Consider releasing balloon's immediately after a pet's euthanasia, during a burial or cremation, following a ceremony, or on the anniversary of a pet's death. Children may be especially interested in honoring or saying good-bye to a pet this way.

The balloons come in white and feature a winged paw print design. Each kit includes 5 balloons and 5 18" lengths of gold cord. $5.00/package. www.veterinarywisdomforpetparents.com/balloonstore.htm

--Tammy

Wednesday Wisdom - Dog or Cat People

Ji

We didn’t use words---this great dog and I.
Our souls blended into each other
like two hues in a watercolor;
our edges blurred.
He was perfect.
I am left with my love
running into an empty space.

                                    ---Susan Hertel

 Do you divide people you know into “cats” and “dogs?”

I mean, do you think of their physical looks and their personalities as being more “cat-like” or “dog-like?” I’ve done this all my life and it’s proved to be fun and useful for me.

The cat people in my life usually have delicate features and a solitary nature.  The dog people are usually athletic, have more angular physical features, and are generally happy, warm and welcoming by nature.  I like both kinds of people, but I’m probably more drawn to “dogs.”   I find that my own “cat” personality is based on shyness and “dogs” make me feel safer and more comfortable in the world.

My Uncle Don was a “dog” in the best possible sense of the word.  His body was big-boned and round, his face was jowly, and his mouth and eyes smiled easily. He had a booming voice and welcoming arms.  When my family would visit, he never failed to greet me at his front door with love and excitement.  I always, always knew he was glad to see me.

His Minnesota home felt like a second home to me.  There, in that house with my Uncle Don presiding over the relatives, I felt like there was another place in the world where I truly belonged.  He added me to the blend he called family and made me feel that I was not only his niece, but his own flesh and blood.  In my Uncle Don’s home, there were no family boundaries. Like the opening poem says, all of there were like “two hues in a watercolor, our edges blurred.” 

Uncle Don died Christmas Eve.  He was 91 and had recently been diagnosed with congestive heart failure.  Just a few months before, he had driven himself to his home town 30 miles away to attend his last high school reunion.  He was the only man left from his class.

His death wasn’t unexpected or tragic.  He lived a full, happy life and was “ready” for whatever comes next. But, I will miss that “great dog” and feel that, for the moment, I am “left with my love
running into an empty space.”

--Laurel

Related articles you might find helpful:

Give the Heart a Memo

50 Ways to Build the Bond with Your Pet

Doctor....Do Dead Pets Watch Over Us?

I've been reading a terrific book by a famous and well-known medium named Concetta Bertoldi (she consults regularly with members of Britain's royal family as well as with american celebrities and politicians). Her book, "Do Dead People Watch You Shower?" is a fascinating compilation of all the questions she's been asked over the years about life after death, and what she has said in reply.

One of the questions posed to her involved pets. Question: " Are our pets waiting for us on the other the side?" Her response was very interesting to me so I'd like to paraphrase it here..."Of course our pets are waiting for us. Pets give us the nearest thing to unconditional love we can ever know on this side. Often, when I'm doing a reading, someone on the other side will tell me to tell my client, "your dog is here or Whiskers can hardly wait to see you again." Sometimes a pet doesn't even wait for you to cross, they come back and visit you on this side in various ways. People who dream about their pets or claim to see them for brief glimpses are probably being visited by that beloved pet who is checking to see if you are all right."

What do you all think? During times of pet death or euthanasia at our hospital, we often will get questions like this about pet souls, what happens to them after death, and if we will ever see them again. As a veterinary professional, it can get really tricky when a client asks these types of questions. You don't want to risk upsetting your client if their beliefs are very different from your own and yet it's nice to be able to express what you truly believe.

How about you? Would you like your veterinarian (veterinary hospital) to give you his/her honest opinions about pet death, pet souls, and the after-life? I'd like to hear your opinions.

--Dana

Bring Out The Cheesy Gold Watch

This week is a tough one. I feel a jumble of wildly conflicting emotions and amidst all the jumble, I'm starting to get a little sea sick. I guess I should explain...

We have an employee who's been with us for over 8 years. Now in the world of veterinary medicine, this is a REALLY LONG time. In fact, it's probably worthy of a cheesy gold watch given out at the retirement party. Veterinary hospitals and clinics tend to have a fairly high level of turnover compared to many other professions (however, I should mention that this can vary a great deal from hospital to hospital). For our hospital, 8 years is an impressive time. She knows our hospital and "the routine" like the back of her hand. She's liked by all of the employees and she's liked and respected by our clients. She's great at animal restraint (even though she's not a technician), and she's got a wonderfully wicked sense of humor. Sounds all good right? Unfortunately though, she is also leaving this week and moving to another city.

For her, this move is a good one. It means better opportunities and a better quality of life for her and her children. Moreover, she's truly happy about it. You can just see it in her eyes and that's a wonderful thing to see. The un wonderful part is that we're really going to miss her.

Question...can you genuinely be happy for someone who's moving on while also feeling sad and upset about them doing it? I'm sure that in every profession out there, this is a common conundrum. How do you support someone who's leaving when you really don't want them to go? I certainly don't have all the answers. The best that I've been able to come up with is telling her the truth. I'm thrilled for her personally, yet I'm really sad that she's leaving.

How do all of you deal with the emotions related to staff turnover? What is it like from a supervisor's point of view and what's it like from an employee's point of view? Any pearls of wisdom for us?

--Dana

Lost Star Jorge Garcia Loses Nunu

I am (was?) a huge fan of the TV show lost. One of my favorite characters and actors is Hugo, played by Jorge Garcia. He is a blogger, and I have really enjoyed reading his blog about life on the island of Hawaii while filming lost.

Many of his posts featured his little dog, Nunu, and she even had a cameo appearance in an episode this season.

Sadly, little Nunu has died. As Garcia was preparing to go to the airport to leave Hawaii, Nunu got away from him and was struck by a car and killed. He says, "She died in my arms." Nunu will be buried in a pet garden in Hawaii.

Send out a good thought for Garcia. I'm sure this is a very difficult time for him. Being in the spotlight probably doesn't make loss and grief any easier! (photo of Nunu from Garcia's blog)

--Tammy

Coco

Coco was the type of dog I refer to as a scamp.
 
She refused to play fetch but, with a glint in her eye, loved to play 'keep-away-from-Laurel'.  She stalled each night when it was time to come inside for bed, lingering in our backyard, barking at the moon. She wouldn't come to the sound of my voice, but she'd race through the door the moment she heard me shaking a bag of dog treats as a lure to get her inside.
 
She was smart, goofy, strategic, and expensive.  She blew out both of her knees chasing rabbits (not tennis balls, heaven forbid!) which required two TPLO surgeries and rehab.  In her younger days, she chewed up a brand new stair banister, a wooden deck chair, a leather ottoman, several UPS deliveries, and too many gloves and shoes to count.
 
Adopting Coco was never our plan.  We'd claimed her brother, the largest male in the litter of Chesapeake Bay retriever puppies but, during a visit with Bear, I made the mistake of picking up Coco. She put both her front paws around my neck in a big hug, looked me straight in the eyes, and laid her tiny head on my shoulder.  Then she sighed.  A big, truly contented sigh.  I swear I heard her call me 'Mom'.
 
Well, that was it.  We adopted two Chessie puppies and, for eight years, lived with what seemed like a wild pack of wolves.  Bear and Coco joined our two cockapoos Sam and Beau and formed a furry unit that never seemed to stop barking or moving.
 
I found Coco last month on Mother's Day lying very still in our yard under our biggest cottonwood tree.  She'd apparently died suddenly and quickly as she'd only been missing for about 10 minutes.  We miss her every day, but I'm comforted by the fact that she died doing what she loved (chasing rabbits), in the yard she loved, after an entire day outside with the family she loved.  A dog really couldn't have had a better life.
 
You are missed, Sweet Coquette!

--Laurel

"It's Okay To Cry...You Want To Know Why?"

I'd like to tell you about a sweet and burley yellow labrador with the personality of a hero and the heart of a locomotive. He gave so much in his 12 years of life on this planet and I feel that it's important to honor him.

We have had a client for over 10 years now that has a neurological disease. He's a fantastic guy who's intelligence and humor sometimes gets obscured by his illness. He has an amazing spirit and grace about him but he would tell you that a lot of his accomplishments are due to one single furry friend...his assistance dog. This amazing dog made his life easier, more accessible, and always broke the ice when making new friends. He not only provided physical assistance, but he provided the emotional support needed to negotiate life with a devastating disease.

Sadly, this beloved companion developed cancer and stopped responding to treatment. He was euthanized last week and afterwards, the client started to cry and apologized for it. In a respectful way, Steve reassured him that it was okay to cry and express his grief...in fact that it was NECESSARY to cry and release those emotions. The minute that Steve gave permission for emotions, it was like the floodgates opening unabated. This man's grief was profound and Steve and I take comfort in knowing that he was able to let out some of this intense pain.

We had just recently heard from this client (he has a new assistance dog). He thanked us for allowing him to express his sadness without us getting uncomfortable or "weird" around him. This situation reminded me of how important it is for veterinary professionals to develop a comfort level with loss and grief. By doing that, they can allow the clients the freedom to experience all of their emotions, even the really intense ones.

How about you? Have any of you known a veterinarian or pet hospital that does a really good job supporting emotions? What kinds of things would you look for in finding someone like this? I'm curious as to your thoughts.

--Dana

P.S. Please join me in taking a moment to honor a dog that gave absolutely everything he had...he was truly, a special soul.

Website Surfing

I was out taking a casual stroll the other day through my MSN browser. I came across a story that made me angry and I'd like to get your opinion on it http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/35286379/ns/health- heal petpet_healthpet_health/petpet_healthpet_health/ 
Since the title contained the words"pet health" I was naturally curious. What I found was an interesting diatribe and protracted criticism of veterinarians as a profession (and how as a group they are so unwilling to acknowledge their mistakes or even apologize.)

The article contained several, detailed stories of mistakes made by veterinary hospitals and encouraged pet owners to sue these doctors for malpractice. They provided another link http://www.vetsfromhell.com and encourage people to visit it. While I agree that veterinarians are human beings capable of making mistakes, it doesn't appear to me that as a profession, veterinary medicine is shirking its responsibilities to the public. 

If you have time, visit one of these links. I'm curious to hear you opinions and your thoughts about how the stories could have been more even-sided.

--Dana

"Call Me The Breeze"

"They call me the breeze...I keep rolling down the road. I've got that green light baby... I gotta keep moving on. There's no change in the weather... ain't no changes in me. I ain't hiding from nobody and nobody's hiding from me. Well now they call  me the breeze...I keep rolling down the road."

 --Lynyrd Skynyrd

This was the perfect life and theme song for my sweet 13 year-old dog Pfeiffer (we had to euthanize her last Thursday night) (see above picture). Despite having two terminal intestinal diseases, she was tough, brave, and still managed to stay casual and calm during rough times. She was an inspiration to our family because she always took whatever adversity she faced in stride. Yes...she had the wisdom to keep rolling down the road because she knew how to take each day as it came, never worrying about yesterday or tomorrow.

It would be an understatement to say that it was difficult for my family and I to euthanize Pfeiffer. As a grief counselor, I'm aware of the nauseous roller coaster that pain and grief can create. Yet, despite all this, I can take some comfort in knowing that this decision was the right one. We gave her a peaceful, loving and dignified death free of needless suffering. It was a hard day, but one I'd like to briefly share.

After the kids got home from school, we took Pfeiffer over to the Garden of The Gods. There are terrific pathways there for people and dogs to walk on (this was one of her favorite spots). It was snowing that afternoon (which we were very grateful for since Pfeiffer has always loved the snow and cold).  Although she had trouble standing up and walking, she was able to walk a little bit with us supporting her. After spending some time sniffing the bushes and listening to the birds, we took her home (after treating her to several Arby's roast beef sandwiches on the ride home). Once home, we put her on her most favorite blanket in our living room and then surrounded her with our own blanket of love.

I'm always hearing from people how helpful World by the Tail products are in working through grief. Last week, I experienced this first hand as we were able to memorialize Pfeiffer right away. We made four ClayPaws® prints (one for each of us). My son chose to use the heart shaped cutter while the other prints were the traditional circle shape). All four prints came out beautifully and were unique to each of us (by using the many charms, ribbons, and stamps available to personalize our prints). We also used one of the large body care bags to transport Pfeiffer's body to the crematory. Later that night, we all sat down together and read both Dog Heaven and A Special Place For Charlee.These books and our subsequent discussion afterward was very healing. During the next few weeks, we also plan to use the Sweet Petatoes® Pet Memories Box, The Photo Brag Books as well as the Deluxe Dog Scrapbook kits. All these products will help us with our grief and keep her close to us.

Like many of you, I'm grateful for the wonderful people and products at World by The Tail.  I'm also grateful that I could talk to you all about my dear, sweet, old lady. Who knows.. with World by the Tail's guidance and our family love, maybe someday I can return to rolling down the road.

--Dana

 

How Many is Too Many?

Q:  My cat died last month and I have kept all of her belongings, including her food dish, exactly where they have always been.  My husband and kids are annoyed with me and want everything disposed of NOW.  Who's right and how much should I keep?  ---"Crazy Cat Lady" in Illinois

A: Wow, this hits home for me right now.

My 89-year-old mother-in-law died recently and I found myself wanting to keep everything she owned that reminded me of her.  And, in fact, I wanted to keep her home exactly as it had always been, too, because walking in there always comforted me and brought me a feeling of peace and well-being.  Entering her living room felt like going home to me.  It was warm and welcoming and, well, homey.  After she died, I needed to feel that way even more than before and in dismantling her rooms, I felt like I was losing her again in the process.

Sometimes keeping everything "exactly where they have always been" provides a short-term comfort, but honestly, if we refuse to move on after a few weeks, we may actually be refusing to fully accept the reality of our loss.  As we divided up my mother-in-law's things and her home transformed into a place I no longer recognized, I felt sad, but it did somehow help me move on through my loss.  I actually could feel some of my attachment to her seem to lighten.

After all, we are NOT our possessions.  And, I found I didn't need to keep everything intact in order to feel connected to this woman whom I loved so much.

Still, experts say keeping a few meaningful "linking objects" (items that remind us of or connect us to a loved one who has died) is healthy and can actually aid the grieving process.  But, how many is too many?  I currently have several boxes of things from my mother-in-law's home, not to mention several other boxes from my own mother who died many years ago!  Eventually whittling this stash down to a few items seems right to me.  And the items I keep won't be the "valuable" ones.  They'll be the things that are personal, something imbued with my loved ones' spirits or reminders of their daily routines...a favorite coffee cup, a ClayPaws® print of a pet's paw, a piece of jewelry worn everyday, etc.

There's really no right or wrong when it comes to keeping or disposing of a loved one's possessions and reminders.  The key is finding a process that works for everyone.  If your family is becoming irritated with your ongoing need to remain inked to your cat, it's important to listen to their concerns.  Perhaps you could remove the items from the rooms you all share and place them somewhere where you can see and touch them when you want to...this might be somewhere in your clothes closet, in a basement work room or store room, etc.  In the public areas, you might place a favorite photo or other tribute that is acceptable to everyone.  This way, your cat won't completely disappear from your life, but your family won't feel "triggered" by their own sadness and grief each time they're in the room.

Remember that what's comforting to one person may be very upsetting to another.  Family grief requires a series of conversations and compromises.  What "linking objects" are acceptable and comforting for all of you?

--Laurel

The Other Side of The Street

 "Physician heal thyself", "put your money where your mouth is", "it's time to walk the talk"...they all apply. My old, sweet German Shepherd mix (Pfeiffer) is slowly dying. In an few weeks, she would turn 14 years old. As much as I want her to make it to that day, I don't want to force her to do it either.

Yes...the pet loss counselor is now the client needing support so I appreciate it if I could share with you. Pfeiffer developed two horrible diseases over the past 6 months. She's got severe inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) which causes a condition known as "protein losing enteropathy." Simply put, her intestines cannot absorb nutrients from the food that she eats. If that wasn't bad enough, she also has a problem known as "exocrine pancreatic insufficiency" (EPI) a disorder in which the pancreas stops producing the enzymes necessary to digest and take in food. There's a specific medicine for this...a powder that actually breaks down or "digests" the food before she eats it. It was working for a short time, but her intestinal disease is proving to be too much for her.

I don't understand all this fancy medical jargon but I do know this...Preiffer is slowly starving to death and there's not a single thing we can do to stop it. No matter what we feed her and what medicines we give her, she is slowly wasting away as her energy, strength, and spirit keeps dropping every day. Since she's not absorbing nutrients, she has lost a great deal of strength and she ends up falling down a lot. She also has trouble with controlling her stool so she has frequent accidents. When I add all this up together, it just doesn't seem like a good quality of life to me.

I can recite for you chapter and verse of all the things I would say to help a client in this situation. It's a whole different matter however when you're on the other side of the street. I find that my head is at constant war with my heart. Intellectually, I know all the questions we need to ask in helping us make a decision about euthanasia. However, my heart is not cooperating as I find that most of the time, all I can do is cry. As Steve is a veterinarian, he could probably keep her going for several more weeks but here's the rub...just because we can keep her alive longer does that mean we should ? It seems ironic to me that I've helped hundreds of pet owners make euthanasia decisions just like this but my professional knowledge is of little help (and it some ways makes it worse).

I've always been a huge proponent of quality of life and it sounds good in theory to euthanize pets before they end up truly suffering. The reality of it however is quite a different thing. It hurts, it's confusing, and it's driving me crazy. As a family, Steve, the kids, and I have decided to euthanize her at the end of this week. Being with her these past few days has been both a blessing and a curse. We can love on her more than we ever have, but in the end, there is still this dark, scary, ominous day coming soon.

I'm sure many of you have been in situations like these with your own pets. How have you balanced the desire to keep them going with their quality of life? Thanks for letting me share with you. I guess it's that's awful time when I  need to put my money where my mouth is.

--Dana

Formalities and Grief

Every once and awhile, we encounter a client who wants a "death certificate" for their pet. Just as with people, these certificates contain an official declaration of death. I think that they can be very helpful in terms of breaking through denial. Obviously, death certificates need to be designed with a lot of compassion and appear very classy. Through my years at CSU, I found a few people who were very offended by the suggestion of a death certificate. One client, in fact, told me that she was "mortified" at the very suggestion of it.

There are pet cemetaries out there that do provide death certificates (for cremation as well). What do you think of these certificates? Would you be offended or put off by having one sent to you? If you think that you would be okay with receiving one, how would you want it to look and what should it say? I'm curious as to your opinions out there!

--Dana

The Gift of Good-Bye

Some good friends of ours just recently had to euthanize their 18 year-old cat. It was very difficult for all of them but it was definitely the right decision (the most loving and humane one). As it turned out, it was just the Father who ended up staying with the cat throughout the euthanasia. I spoke with my friend several days after to see how she and her family were doing. They have two boys (ages 15 and 11). Both of the boys were doing well although feeling very sad (of course).

The interesting part for me was when she told me that both boys specifically thanked her for the opportunity to say good-bye. Both were very sure that they didn't want to stay during the euthanasia, but they were given their own, personal and private chance to say good-bye in their own way. Now, for a teen-age boy to THANK a parent for anything...that "anything" must be pretty amazing. I've seen it and lectured about it countless times, but I'm continually reminded about how important it is to let children say good-bye to their beloved pets. It may sound like a simple thing...but it can make a great deal of difference when it comes to grieving that loved one.

Did any of you have experiences with childhood pets where you were not given the opportunity to say good-bye when they died? What do you think about this, and what do you think is the best way to help children?

--Dana

Sad Loss for Martha Stewart

Martha Stewart has lost another pet. Her cat, Mozart, passed away yesterday at the age of 19.

Stewart is well-known for having dogs such as Chows, and French bulldogs, but her cat remained out of the spotlight it seems. He was a lynx Himalayan, a rare breed from what I read.

Stewart wrote on Twitter this morning that Mozart has been laid to rest next to her chow Paw Paw, who passed away in April 2008. Stewart also lost her new chow pup Ghengis Khan on March 6 in an explosion at the kennel.

Our thoughts are with you Ms. Stewart!

Rest Well Mozart!

(Full story at PeoplePets. Photo from The Martha Blog)

--Tammy

Party Pictures of Patricia!

Thursday was Patricia's (our Office Manager for the last nine years) last day of work.  She's retiring and taking her joyful, uplifting personality with her!  We'd like to bottle some of what she has and sell it along with our ClayPaws® kits.  Then, we'd really have a business!

Anyway, we had a party, of course, (we try to have an excuse for a celebration at least once a month around here!) and here are some of the photos from our day.  We also made a large clay patty for Patricia that each of us made a thumbprint in...another new way to use ClayPaws® prints---as a 'going-away' gift for a staff member! (photo coming soon!)

We will miss you, Patricia!

--Laurel, and the whole staff of World by the Tail, Inc.

To Claim Cremains, or Not to Claim Cremains: That is the Question.

Q:  "I couldn't face the reality of picking up my cat's cremains right after she died.  Despite several reminder messages from my veterinarian, they told me they no longer had her ashes when I stopped  to get them 6 months later!  I was devastated and heart-broken.  What can I do?"--Angel in Seattle

A: Unfortunately, Angel, this is a situation that happens quite often and I can see both sides of the dilemma.  From your perspective, you trust your veterinary team to understand the difficulty and process of your grief and assume they'll give you time to heal before you face the reality of your cat's altered physical state.  However, on the veterinary side, I understand how difficult it is for them to know just how long they should be required to remain the guardian of an item (cremains, collars, ClayPaws® prints) that is potentially quite precious to another person, especially when they don't really know whether or not the item will ever be claimed.

There are many ethical and communication issues here that we can briefly sort through.  Hopefully, something might click for you and help you know what to do next.

First, you and other pet parents should be aware that unclaimed personal items are a growing problem for veterinary teams.  A growing awareness about the needs of their grieving clients has made them reluctant to throw anything away.  Yet, in some clinics, their former patients' dog sweaters, cat carriers, and cremains are stacking up wherever there is free space.  One clinic I know has a 'one-year hold' policy and, when they notify their client about the item, they tell them the date that the item will be disposed of, if not claimed.  This reminder is made by telephone once and followed by a letter.  After one year, they donate bedding, collars, etc., to the humane society and dump cremains and ClayPaws® prints into a common area just outside their back door around some shrubbery and a small evergreen tree.  It's sort of their own Tribute Garden.  This way, they don't feel like they are throwing away something meaningful and clients have a point of reference for the final resting place of their pet should they ever desire to know what became of their cremains.

In my opinion, any veterinary clinic that makes ClayPaws® prints or returns cremains directly to their clients should be clear about how long they will keep them if not immediately claimed.

Second, I truly do understand how difficult it can be to think about retriving the cremains of a beloved pet.  Honestly, the drastic change in form, size, and tactile connection can be downright shocking if you're not prepared ahead of time for what you will receive.  For some, it's like losing a pet all over again.

Yet, it's not fair to your veterinarian to simply not respond to reminders.  At the very least, you should respond to their request, asking for a bit more time before picking up your pet's personal items.  Make a definite plan about when you will be there and call again if you need to change your mind.  Even better, ask a friend or family member to pick up your pet's cremains, paw print, etc., and keep it for you until you're at the point where you will be comforted by the item, rather than further disturbed.

Angel, as hard as it may be to face the truth, you may want to ask your veterinarian what they finally did with your cat's cremains.  Some return them to the crematory for storage and you may be able to retrieve them there.  If they have a mass burial or scatter site, at least you might feel connected with your pet in that area.  And, if those methods fail, they are other ways to memorialize a pet...make a donation in your cat's name, create a scrapbook or memory box dedicated to your cat, or find ways to educate others about picking up cremains so they can be spared the sadness you experienced when you delayed.

Our thoughts are with you, Angel.  Thanks for bringing an important and little discussed situation to our attention.

--Laurel

Harry's Sassy Bark

Last week we said good-bye to a special friend. He was a beautiful guy with a loving heart and a desire to talk alot  Today, I'm feeling really sad (along with the rest of the staff at the pet hospital). We had to say goodbye to our beloved Harry. Harry was a 12-year old Samoyed who starting coming to us when he was just a puppy. Every single time he came to the pet hospital, he had much to say about the situation. In fact, from the time he would enter the hospital up until the time he left he would bark constantly. I'm not just talking about brief, fleeting conversations here...Harry would recite the complete works of Shakespeare and enjoy every single minute of it.
 
You always knew when Harry was in the hospital. His characteristic bark made him completely endearing along with his sweet, playful, and affectionate demeanor (I can see in my mind's eye his fluffy butt wiggling with his white tail). You always got the sense that whatever Harry was saying, it was extremely important. Over the years, Steve and the rest of our staff found it necessary to talk over Harry in the exam room during appointments. On days when Steve saw him, he would always ask..."Do you agree with that diagnosis Harry?" and Harry would perk up his ears, bark even louder, and hop up and down. Talk about a great conversationalist.
 
We knew that this day was coming. We knew that Harry was starting to feel every single second of his 12 years and that it was affecting his quality of life. Harry's family are some of the kindest, most conscientious, and thoughtful people we've ever known. They knew that someday they were going to have to let him go. Friday turned out to be that day. After an agonizingly painful decision, Harry's family chose to euthanize him. On a  huge fluffy blanket and with his soft head cradled in the laps of those he loved, he died peacefully and painlessly. Despite being very ill and weak, Harry still managed to talk to us before he died. He never stopped reaching out to us, letting us know what he thought.  My biggest hope now is that Harry always knew we were listening and that we cared.

Comforted by some of Harry's pawprints (ClayPaws® prints) and clippings of his fur, his family must now endure the painful process of grief. I want his family to know that they're not alone... that we're feeling sad too... and that we'll always miss him. Thanks for sharing your life and personality with us Harry. We'll always think of you chatting up a storm with your sweet, sassy bark. We'll miss you and wish you well.

(Photo from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samoyed_(dog))

--Dana

Sad News for Oprah

Remember about 10 days ago, I told you that Oprah had adopted a new puppy? Well, apparently, she adopted two puppies, and tragedy has struck.

Ivan, the second pup she chose to adopt, has apparently died from Parvovirus (learn more about Parvovirus here.) The first dog she chose to adopt, Sadie - from the same litter as Ivan, also is fighting off the virus and is gravely ill. (story here) Just last week, Oprah shared Sadie with her audience and the TV viewers. While showing off Sadie, the shelter (PAWS) brought out more of the pups from the litter, and Oprah was deciding on-air whether she might adopt another pup. She apparently chose to adopt Ivan.

On March 12, she had to rush him to an emergency pet hospital. Ivan didn't make it unfortunately. Sadie is reportedly doing better at this time. Please send out good energy, prayers (whatever you might believe in!) to Oprah and her Sadie. Rest well, Ivan.

--Tammy

Tragedy Strikes Martha Stewart

Over the weekend, Martha Stewart's new puppy, Ghengis Khan, was killed in a tragic explosion. The 9-week old pup
was still at the breeder's where the explosion happened. There were 17 dogs killed in the propane explosion, and the driver of the propane truck is listed in critical condition.

The propane tank ignited while the driver was making a propane delivery. The driver, Timothy Kleinhagen, managed to save one dog's life even though he, himself, was injured quite badly. Karen Tracy, the co-owner of the kennel, was
the owner of many of the dogs who died.

Martha Stewart issued a statement, "My heart goes out to Karen Tracy and I am hoping for a speedy recovery for those (both pets and humans) injured in this terrible event."

We send our thoughts and condolences to Ms. Stewart, Ms. Tracy, and wish speedy recovery to the humans and pups who were injured. (Photo from Martha's Blog)

--Tammy

Rest Well, Loki

Just yesterday, I read a story on People.com about Mickey Rourke. He has had a comeback of sorts this year with his movie The Wrestler. He won a Golden Globe award last month for his acting. In his acceptance speech, he thanked his dogs, saying, "I'd like to thank all my dogs, the ones who are here and the ones who aren't here anymore."

In this article, he states that his dogs saved his life during some dark days. He said, "I sort of self- destructed and everything came out about fourteen years or so ago... the wife had left, the career was over... The dogs were there when no one else was there."

Sadly, this morning, I read that his 18 year-old chihuahua, Loki had passed away. Loki accompanied Rourke to many red carpet events and has been famously photographed with Rourke many times. I know that Loki will be missed. Rest well, Loki. And take good care Mr. Rourke!

You can see more photos of Mr. Rourke and his dogs at PeoplePets.com.

(Photo from jezebel.com)

--Tammy

Animals in Fine Art

I just learned this morning that artist Andrew Wyeth passed away yesterday at the age of 91. He is the artist who created one of my favorite paintings. It is titled Master Bedroom and features a lovely dog curled up on a bed.

Do you have favorite paintings that feature animals? Many artists feature animals in their work. I love Picasso's line drawings of animals too. So simplistic, and yet powerful!

Rest Well Mr. Wyeth. 

--Tammy

Rest in Peace, Gus

  Remember Gus? I wrote about him this summer when he won the title "World's Ugliest Dog".

Today, Gus lost his battle with cancer. He died at the age of 9. Gus was rescued from a bad home and lived happily with his adoptive family in Florida. He lost a leg to skin cancer, and was missing an eye from a fight with a cat. His adoptive family loved him in spite of his "ugly" looks.

Rest well Gus! You will be missed!

(Photo from MSNBC.com)

Rest in Peace Jerry

One of the many blogs I read - Jerry's Place for Tripawds - has experienced great loss. Jerry, the wonderful tripawd who "wrote" many of the posts, has died. His people made the decision to let him go on Friday, October 3.

Jerry lived many months longer than he was expected to post amputation. He brought much joy to his people. Through his blog and website, he brought much information and support to other pet parents experiencing cancer and amputation in their own dogs.

Jerry will be missed greatly. Blessed Be!

(Photo from the gallery at Jerry's Place)

R.I.P. Jenny

Jenny, the oldest living gorilla in captivity, died last night at the Dallas Zoo. She was 55 years old and had lived in Dallas for more than a quarter century!

According to the story, she had to be euthanized last night because of an inoperable tumor in her stomach. She wasn't eating or drinking. I loved how her keepers described her. "Sweet, though a little bossy."

Gorillas apparently can live to be about 30 or 35 in the wild and quite a lot longer than that in captivity. She was one of only 6 gorillas in captivity over the age of 50.

Jenny will be missed by the zoo and it's visitors! Rest Well Jenny and Blessed Be.

(Photo from Associated Press.)

Sad Weekend at My House

I had a sad kitty weekend at my house. It's sad AND happy actually.

We have five cats - 3 boys and 2 girls. The girls (Miss Girl and Luna) do not get along. We combined our kitties about 2 and a half years ago, and for this whole time - they have not gotten along! We kept thinking that it would settle down, they would get used to each other, but it hasn't happened.

Miss Girl is a special case. Mike (my other half) rescued her and Ben from a very abusive situation. She has some pretty odd medical issues that we are working on figuring out. What I finally decided is that this little cat deserves to be happy, and with Luna in the house, she is not.

So - after much worrying, we decided to try and place Luna somewhere else. Luna is a happy-go-lucky cat who likes everyone, so she'll adjust. We're hoping that Miss Girl will adjust and settle down a bit with Luna gone.

Thankfully, our friends Rod and Rebecca love Luna and have decided to take her (temporarily for now - but permanently unless something bad happens). We took Luna to them on Saturday morning. (They have two cats - both boys, so we think she'll do well!) She was doing quite well when we left her on Saturday - wandering around and checking out the house. She was nervous, and shedding like a fiend, but she knows and loves Rod and Rebecca already! Their two cats (Angus and Fezzig) hadn't come out of hiding while we were there.

I had to call (concerned kitty mom!) yesterday to see how she had done over night. It seems like she is going to adjust quite quickly! The boys are taking longer to adjust to her, but there hasn't been any  actual fighting or bad stuff!

I am very sad that Luna had to find a new place, but I will be happy if it helps Miss Girl be a happier kitty. Knowing that Luna is with people who love her, and knowing that I can still see her and get updates has helped immensely! If this works out, and Luna stays with Rod and Rebecca permanently, the next time I visit, I plan to make a ClayPaws® print for myself of Luna's paw so I have a keepsake of my big girl! You know, the thing I missed the most about her this weekend? She has been my "bathroom buddy" her whole life. I never went into the bathroom where Luna didn't come with me for almost five years! It was lonely without her!

We'll miss you, Sam!

World by the Tail, Inc. has lost one of it's favorite pets. Laurel, co-owner of the business, has lost her buddy Sam to a very rapid cancer. He died in her arms yesterday afternoon only a week after diagnosis.

Sam was loved by all of us here at WBTT. He was a little Cockapoo with a big heart. He visited our offices many times and always brought joy. He was often our "model" for demonstration ClayPaws® prints too!

He will be missed by Laurel and her family, but also by all of us here at work as well.

Good-bye Sam. Blessed Be.