Formalities and Grief

Every once and awhile, we encounter a client who wants a "death certificate" for their pet. Just as with people, these certificates contain an official declaration of death. I think that they can be very helpful in terms of breaking through denial. Obviously, death certificates need to be designed with a lot of compassion and appear very classy. Through my years at CSU, I found a few people who were very offended by the suggestion of a death certificate. One client, in fact, told me that she was "mortified" at the very suggestion of it.

There are pet cemetaries out there that do provide death certificates (for cremation as well). What do you think of these certificates? Would you be offended or put off by having one sent to you? If you think that you would be okay with receiving one, how would you want it to look and what should it say? I'm curious as to your opinions out there!

--Dana

Comments

[Laurel]

I know this is an idea that has been around a long time in "pet loss" circles of discussion. I've always thought it could be something veterinarians could issue upon request, but shouldn't be given as a standard practice. Even with human deaths, the certificates have to be requested (and paid for) by family members, attorney's, etc.

There are also unique circumstances with animals, like doctors are not always present or even aware of a patient's death. Also there are no centralized authorities who investigate or pronounce deaths, like coroners in human medicine/law enforcement.

I've heard a lot of veterinarians say they would not want anything official given to people as they are afraid the information could somehow be used against them to file a lawsuit.

In conclusion, I've always been amazed that conversations about a piece of paper could have so many facets and potential impacts. After a couple of decades of work in this area, I still don't know what I think about the idea.

What about our pet parent readers? What would you want? Why would you want one? I'm truly interested!

[jan]

My veterinarian always sends a personalized sympathy card that is very meaningful. Beyond that I wouldn't want anything else.

[Dana Durrance]

Hi Laurel and Jan,

I agree with you Jan that a personalized sympathy card is absolutely essential! I'm in the same position you are Laurel...I still don't quite know how I feel about this issue. You're right...we're not just talking about a "piece of paper" here--we're talking about the very complicated emotions of grief and loss. Things get complicated really quickly. I'd really like to hear from other pet parents as well!